Title: Beyond the Mind's Control
Pairing: Yunjae, Yoosu,
Genre: Angst, horror, drama
Disclaimer: i only own them in my dreams
Summary: No summary. deal
Author's Note: this was originally not a yunjae fic so i changed all the names of the characters. i did it for my bishee reya so blame her for the fail that is this fanfic xD it has demonic possession, implied rape, murder, adn violence so don't read it if you don't like it. also, i wrote this like.... idk 3 years ago? so it's godaweful. please forgive me for that <3
Beyond the Mind's Control Chapter 3
Yunho went straight home, ignoring his usual limit of only twenty miles an hour over. He wanted to go home and away from anybody he could hurt if he was taken over.
He finally arrived home and locked the four locks on his door. The house was built with only one, but after his mother had died, he added the other three to help keep him self in. Yunho slammed his back to the wall and tried to calm his shaking breath. It was hard to believe that he and Yoochun had once been best friends now that he felt the desire to slit Yoochun’s throat every time he saw that well formed face.
When Yunho felt the struggle coming from his Other slightly lessen, he staggered to his room. His wrists burned and felt like they were being torn apart from beneath his skin. With one hand clamped tightly on the other wrist, Yunho opened his desk drawer and pulled out a small switchblade knife. He let his wrist go and made a deep incision over an old scar. Immediately after he saw the sight of his blood, the pain eased away.
Yunho wasn’t quite sure how it worked, but every time he would inflict pain on himself, every other pain would disappear. He loved the feeling of virtual numbness surrounding him and it kept his Other at ease. The world faded around him as he slid to the floor with his back against the wall and his mind wandered into a dream-filled sleep.
He felt Jaejoong’s lips pressed tightly against his and their naked skin brushing against each other as the smaller body moved in sync with his… He loved Jaejoong with every fiber of his being, but there was no response from his unconscious body. His mind told him to stop, to wake Jaejoong from the slumber he forced the innocent boy into, but his Other urged him on. He desired to have Jaejoong like this for so long and now that he finally got his chance, he wanted nothing more than for it to be over. Jaejoong’s blood covered his lower body but still he continued with his sin. And at that moment Yunho knew this was more than just a dream; it was a memory.
Yunho tasted the hint of alcohol on Jaejoong’s tongue as he kissed the smaller’s unresponsive lips. Yunho waited for him to kiss back and to love him the way he loved Jaejoong, but it was a far thought; he objected to sex more than anything and had made it clear to him several times. While Yunho respected that, his Other wouldn’t settle for just the taste of Jaejoong’s sweet lips. His Other wanted everything and wouldn’t let Yunho go without.
The scene faded and then reappeared with him in a familiar place: the soft hum of the dryer, the guilt fresh in his mind, the bloodstained sheets in the wash. He was in his laundry room. Even though the dream hadn’t showed her yet, Yunho could feel that his mother was still alive… but not for long.
Then he heard her voice coming from behind him, the voice he yearned to hear in reality again. “My Yunho doing his own laundry? I’m shocked!” his mother said in her light hearted voice.
“It’s only some sheets Mom…” was his only reply. His voice was slightly worried, just like it had been that day.
His mother’s face turned from playful to confused. “But I just washed your sheets two days ago. You shouldn’t waist water like that Yunho,” she said as she opened the washing machine.
Panic gripped at Yunho’s heart at his action. He knew what she would figure out what he’d done to Jaejoong if she took out the sheets. He couldn’t let that happen; he couldn’t let the scene replay. Let me take care of it… the voice in his mind hissed.
“No,” Yunho thought. “You’ll hurt her.”
You have no choice. She’ll see what you did…
“I don’t care! YOU’LL HURT HER!” Yunho screamed in his mind.
His mother took out the sheets and stared in horror at the mass of partially washed out blood on the ivory linen. “What have you done?!” she cried.
Too late… his Other hissed. The very next second, his vision was covered by a thick layer of red and he was no longer in control.
The demonic whisper escaped from his mouth mixed with his normal voice at an octave lower. “Don’t say a word,” he hissed. His hand involuntarily shot to his pocket and drew out the switchblade knife and outstretched it toward his mother.
Horror continued to flood his mother’s expression as she dropped to her knees. “No! Oh please no!” she cried. Tears had built in her eyes at the realization of what had taken over her only living son. “Please don’t!”
Yunho shoved the blade to his mother’s throat. “I said don’t say a word!” he shrieked.
“Please…” his mother whimpered as his eyes met Yunho’s. “Give me my son back.”
Yunho’s gorgeous face twisted in disgust. “Now you’ve crossed the line.”
The scene played in slow motion. Yunho jerked his hand back, shifted his weight, thrust the blade forward, and plunged the knife into his mother’s chest. He gave the knife a slight twist before tearing it out and he watched his mother fall to the ground with a grin of pure delight bending his lips. But his real mind was screaming at the top of his lungs for his mother.
His mother trembled at his feet with her eyes wide open. She let her final sentence slip from her quivering lips. “I love you Yunho…” And then she was still.
Yunho awoke from his nightmare to the sound of vicious screaming. Only after he took a deep, gasping breath did he realize it came from his own throat. He tightly closed his eyes and wrapped his arms around his legs, sobbing like a child. “Why do you have to do this to me??” he shouted at himself.
He dug his nails deep into his skin in attempt to ease the pain, but the image of his mother’s final face was etched into his vision. He had done such horrible things to the ones he loved…
After an hour of trying to calm himself down, Yunho felt composed enough to look at the clock. The neon red numbers flashed 3:17 AM with a little red SAT underneath… but he had one question: how the hell did he get back in his room? He was sure he had fallen asleep by the front door.
Having no real desire to find out, Yunho eased himself back into thinking about sleep. He was more exhausted now than before he had fallen into the dream, even though he had been out for nearly five and a half hours. He desperately wanted to rest for a while longer, but he was petrified of having another memory instead of a normal dream. He didn’t want to remember that he took advantage of the love of his life and he didn’t want to remember that he was his mother’s murderer.
Morning came and Yunho’s eyes slid open, taking in the rays of gold entering his room from the window. Birds twittered outside and disappeared behind the billowing curtains that framed the sunlit glass. Yunho had to blink a few times before he accepted the scene as reality; it was far too perfect and something felt wrong. He wriggled his way out of the sheets that were tightly wrapped around him and got to his feet. Then it hit him.
His room was back in perfect order; no blood on the carpet, his furniture was all back in their normal places, his papers were neatly stacked on his desk, and the sheets were back on his bed as if they hadn’t been torn up the night he tried to hang himself. “What on Earth…?” he whispered.
I got sick of living in this pile of garbage for two weeks… his Other hissed in the back of his mind.
“But you can’t control me while I’m asleep…” Yunho murmured, rubbing his eyes.
You weren’t asleep. Besides, aren’t you late for school?
Yunho shook his head. “It’s Saturday… Nobody goes to school on Saturday smart one…”
Think again Yunho…
“What do you mean?” Just as the question escaped from his lips, Yunho felt his head involuntarily turn to face the clock. The neon red flashed 11:43 AM with a little MON underneath, signaling that it was Monday.
Yunho’s eyes widened and he snatched the clock off his desk. “Monday?? How the hell can it be Monday?? I couldn’t have slept the entire weekend!”
I told you, you weren’t asleep...
“Then what was I doing?? No, what were you doing??” Yunho practically screamed.
Nothing… his Other replied smoothly.
Yunho sighed angrily. “Never mind!” he shouted as he yanked his school uniform on. He hurried down to the front door and slammed it as he walked out. A little flutter of pink caught his eye, but he ignored it and continued to his car.
Yunho finally reached his school just in time for the bell to ring signaling the end of freshmen lunch. “God damnit! Why couldn’t you wake me up earlier?” Yunho griped in his mind as he weaved his way through the hundreds of gossiping freshmen to his class.
That’s just it; I couldn’t... his other hissed.
His classmates all jerked their heads up as Yunho came through the door. Jaejoong was the only one who flashed him a smile before he turned to the teacher.
“I’m sorry for being late Mr. Lee. I had some…family issues,” Yunho lied.
The teacher folded his arms over his chest and raised one eyebrow. “Do you have a note?” he asked.
“No sir,” Yunho responded. “I didn’t think to get one…”
Mr. Lee sighed. “Take your seat Yunho.”
Yunho obediently strode to his desk beside Jaejoong, ignoring the other students’ stares that burned holes in his neck.
“So what really happened?” Jaejoong whispered.
“I slept in… That’s all…” Yunho whispered back.
“You didn’t answer your phone all weekend either.”
“I was busy,” Yunho lied. He hated lying to Jaejoong, but he had no other option; he didn’t exactly know what he had done for those two days either. And he had to be honest with himself, he was afraid of the truth.