Title: Beyond the Mind's Control
Pairing: Yunjae, Yoosu,
Genre: Angst, horror, drama
Disclaimer: i only own them in my dreams
Summary: No summary. deal
Author's Note: this was originally not a yunjae fic so i changed all the names of the characters. i did it for my bishee reya so blame her for the fail that is this fanfic xD it has demonic possession, implied rape, murder, adn violence so don't read it if you don't like it. also, i wrote this like.... idk 3 years ago? so it's godaweful. please forgive me for that <3
Beyond the Mind's Control Chapter 7
Yunho watched Jaejoong with curious eyes until he could no longer stand the suspense. “What are you up to?” Yunho asked.
Jaejoong shrugged and stretched out on the soft white cushions of his couch. “I’m not up to anything. Unless you call skipping school up to something; then I just might be,” he said with a poorly hidden grin.
Yunho slowly made his way to the chair directly across from Jaejoong’s couch with his eyes never leaving Jaejoong’s face. He truly did trust his boyfriend, maybe not as much as before, but he trusted him none the less. Even with his trust, he still had to wonder what Jaejoong was planning to do with him. He figured it had to be something big; if it wasn’t, his Other wouldn’t be going berserk in his mind. But that only made Yunho question the situation even more. His Other had been demanding that they leave since he got here, so why hadn’t he just taken control and left by himself?
Even with his slight confusion, Yunho noticed Jaejoong’s amusement gradually fade into a state of thoughtfulness. “Do you really want to get rid of your other personality Yunho?” he asked after a long silence.
“More than anything,” Yunho answered in full honesty. His Other did have some advantages, but the downsides outweighed the good. He’d wanted to get rid of his Other ever since he could hear that demonic whisper invading his thoughts, and the want only increased with the elevation of his Other’s control. He wanted to get rid of being a murderer. He wanted his own life back.
“Then why didn’t you ever do anything about it? You’ve known for what… ten years?” Jaejoong asked, shifting his gaze to Yunho.
“It wasn’t ever a real problem before,” Yunho replied with a shrug.
“But you knew something was wrong with you, didn’t you?”
“Well I didn’t exactly think it was normal…”
“Yet you never did anything about it?”
“Alright Jaejoong, what are you getting at?” Yunho asked, slightly frustrated. His Other was raising all hell inside of his mind to the point where he thought it would crumble if he didn’t leave. But he wasn’t leaving without an explanation and a good reason.
“I thought you trusted me,” Jaejoong said.
“I do,” Yunho half lied. Then he felt it; a presence approaching that sucked the life out of him with every inch closer it came. His Other’s demonic scream drowned out any other sound and shredded his thoughts. Yunho fell to his knees and his fingers tore at his hair. “What have you done??” he said through deep gasps.
Jaejoong was already on his knees beside him, trying to calm him down. “I haven’t done anything Yunho,” he said calmly. “What’s wrong?”
Only seconds later, the screams in Yunho’s mind went silent long enough to hear a knock on the door. He opened his blood red eyes and they locked on the door. “Who the hell is that?” Yunho hissed. He managed to glimpse a grey haired man in a black robe through the window and shoved Jaejoong away from him. “A priest??” he shrieked. Rage exploded inside of Yunho and his breath came quick and short.
“Yunho please, you have to understand. He can help you!” Jaejoong pleaded. But his supplications were only met with a lightning fast strike to his face.
“No! He will not get rid of me!!! How dare you even try??” Yunho was shaking with rage and his control was only hanging by a thread. But then, everything stopped. The screams in his mind went silent, the shaking stopped, and he could see tears rolling down Jaejoong’s face, feeling sympathy and guilt. “Jaejoong, I’m so-”
Jaejoong shook his head. “Just let him in,” he said quietly as he got back on his feet.
After several long seconds of staring at Jaejoong, unsure of what else to do, Yunho staggered to the door and opened it to see the stout priest before him. Ever nerve in Yunho’s body was instantly on fire as he glared at the holy man.
“Ahh, you must be Yunho,” the priest said, peering over his thick glasses at Yunho. He stuck out his hand and smiled.
Yunho just scowled at the man and went back to Jaejoong. “Did I hurt you?” he whispered. His hand lightly touched Jaejoong’s face as he gazed at the red mark he had given the love of his life.
But Yunho’s question went ignored. “Thanks for coming Father,” he said softly. He pushed Yunho’s hand away from his and bowed to the priest.
“It was no trouble at all Jaejoong-sshi. I enjoy doing God’s work,” the priest said. He set his big black bag on the floor and examined Yunho. “How old are you son?”
“Don’t call me son,” Yunho sneered. He flopped down on the couch, putting his arm stiffly around Jaejoong.
“Oh pity… The demons are very active among the young lately…”
Yunho’s eyes scrunched and he leaned forward, fake laughing as hard as he could. “Sorry old man. I’m not possessed, I have a mental condition. Dissociative Identity Disorder, have you ever heard of it? I’m professionally diagnosed and everything, just ask my retarded doctor. He said it was commonly mistaken for demonic possession sooo I think we can just call this a misunderstanding and go home.” Yunho clapped his hands together and gave the priest a sarcastic smile. “And I swear, if you shove a cross in my face I’ll shove it down your throat and kill you on my own accord.”
The priest laughed lightly. “Oh no, I wouldn’t do that. Contact with crucifixes are almost a last resort. So, do tell me, when was the last time you went to church?”
“I was only a few months old. My mother…” Yunho had trouble speaking of his mother since her murder, especially about something he did that negatively affected her. “My mother said that I screamed until she took me out, so she stopped going.”
“Ahh, I see.”
Yunho sighed. “What does that have to do with anything? Plenty of non possessed people don’t go to church. Frankly, I’ve never even wanted to go. I could if I wanted to though.”
“Do you have to fight with everything he says??” Jaejoong blurted out. “He’s trying to help you Yunho! Why don’t you just let him?”
Yunho glared at Jaejoong. The thought of his boyfriend siding with a stupid priest made him sick. “How can you agree with him?” Yunho hissed. “I’ve already told you people: I-am-not-possessed!”
“Who said you were??” Jaejoong shot back.
“No one but I know that’s exactly what you’re thinking,” Yunho rose to his feet, still glaring at Jaejoong and the priest. “If you don’t mind I’m going to school now.” Yunho went to the door after tearing his eyes away from them. His Other screamed in his mind as he reached for the doorknob. His hand touched the metal and it felt as if his skin was being burned right off of his hand. An ear-piercing shriek filled the room as Yunho cringed away from the door. He glared back at it with flaming eyes to see a wet shine lighting up the holy gold.
“Seriously? Holy water?” Yunho sneered, trying to seem calm. He was cradling his still burning right hand in his shirt to let it absorb as much water as possible. He took possession into consideration, but he never actually thought it to be true. The spiritual world was something he left behind long ago, or rather something he never took interest in to begin with. Demons and angels were things for the religious people, not him. But if he wasn’t really possessed, why would contact with holy water make him want to chop his arm off to end the pain?
“We had to make sure you couldn’t leave until this was over… I’m sorry…” Jaejoong apologized.
“Until what was over?” Yunho asked. Panic had seeped into his voice despite his greatest attempts at composure. “Oh hell no… You aren’t going to try an exorcism, are you??”
“No no!” Jaejoong cried, waving his hands and rushing to Yunho. He took Yunho’s right hand and wiped the remaining water on his shirt. “You don’t have to worry about that today. I promise.”
“Not today? But you are going to?”
“It has to be done Yunho, you know that. You can’t keep on living this way!” Jaejoong paused and stared at his hand tightly locked with Yunho’s. “I can’t keep living this way…” he whispered.
Yunho was unable to see Jaejoong’s eyes, but he knew of the pain they were trying to mask; he could feel it in his touch. “Jaejoong…”
Jaejoong lifted his head, revealing shining eyes that were on the verge of tears. “I want this to be over for good. I hate having to be afraid of you.” The tears finally broke through their barrier and spilled onto his cheeks.
Yunho’s heart tore at the sight of his love’s sorrow. He was willing to do anything, anything to take it all away from him and make Jaejoong smile again. “Okay, I’ll do it. I’ll go through with your stupid exorcism. Just please don’t cry anymore.” Yunho wrapped his arms around Jaejoong and the gesture was returned with a few light sobs. Yunho pushed his face into Jaejoong’s soft hair, breathing in his scent. “Please don’t cry anymore…” Yunho reluctantly turned his head to look at the priest. “What do I have to do?” he asked.
A smile pushed up the priest’s plum cheeks. “I’m glad you’ve decided to cooperate with us Yunho. We can’t do anything today since I can’t do an exorcism before I know what I’m dealing with.”
“You’re dealing with a sixteen year old kid who has a personality disorder. What’s there to know?” Yunho remarked.
“I need to find out the nature of the demon. Do you think you could summon him?”
“Yeah, that’s totally possible,” Yunho said caustically, rolling his eyes. “This is so stupid…” he thought.
You got yourself into this mess. Go cry yourself out or something… Yunho’s Other sneered.
“All I can do is hear him,” Yunho continued. The more he thought about it, the more Yunho truly wanted his Other gone. True, he had calmed way down since his Other’s struggle to get Yunho away from Jaejoong’s house, but Yunho wasn’t all to happy with his stuck-up and stubborn attitude either. He sighed deeply. “Could you really get rid of him? For good I mean,” Yunho asked hesitantly. He was very curious to see if the stout man sitting only a few feet away had more power than this so called “demon,” but he didn’t want to show that he was giving in so quickly.
“All I can do is try, but yes, there is a very good chance that he’ll be gone for good,” the priest said with a smile.
Don’t be so smug. Do you actually think he can overpower me? I thought even you would be smarter than that…
Jaejoong just sat in silence, praying that his plan would work and not end in complete disaster like his other plans had so many times before. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to go on if the exorcism failed; Yunho would be far beyond his reach if it did. And who knows, Yunho might be even more motivated to kill him. Then again… if he lost him for good, dying wouldn’t be such a horrible solution.
Yunho read Jaejoong’s face like a book. He could see the thoughts of death roll across and darken Jaejoong’s expression, and couldn’t help but to think that it was all his fault. “Is there any way we could get this over with sooner?”
“Just be patient…” Jaejoong muttered.
Yunho watched the priest’s eyes linger on Jaejoong’s sullen expression, sparking a white-hot rage inside of him. He couldn’t tell himself why, but it was there.
The priest droned on and on, asking Yunho and Jaejoong a series of seemingly irrelevant questions. He finished two hours later and stood. “I’ll see what I can do about this. Since the presence has been within him for so long, it will be more difficult to remove,” the priest said. With that said, he left.
Neither Yunho nor Jaejoong said a word for what seemed like forever. Jaejoong didn’t look at him even though Yunho kept his eyes on him, trying to get him to say something, anything. Yunho didn’t know what to say; he didn’t know what he could say that wouldn’t throw Jaejoong off the edge he struggled so hard to keep his boyfriend on.
Finally, Jaejoong rose to his feet and grazed his fingertips over Yunho’s cheek. “I’ll see you later…” Jaejoong said. His voice was not even strong enough to be called a whisper, and his eyes were just as distant as his voice. He strode up his elegant staircase and disappeared without another word.
“Oh wonderful…” Yunho thought. “He’s in one of those moods again…” Yunho shook his head and left Jaejoong to wallow in his mind alone.
Yunho arrived home suddenly feeling exhaustion sweep over every fiber of his being. Once again, he took no mind to the pink slip of paper he had pulled off his front door as he staggered to his room. He glanced at the clock before flopping on his bed. 11:06 AM. “Oh wonderful!” Yunho laughed. “Before noon and you’ve already worn me out!” Yunho prodded his mind for a response from his Other, but turned up with nothing; not even a glimmer of a response. He sat up, thinking that the comfort of his bed might have interfered with his ability to hear his Other’s hisses. “Hello? Aren’t you going to say some stupid comeback?” Still nothing. Yunho waited for a little longer, not noticing himself slowly slipping from consciousness and into a deep, nightmare-ridden sleep.